April 10th, 2007
Confessions of a Hate Filled Mind
I would forgive… if I was a little more godly. But I am not. I am a mortal. And I sin. Not forgive. I do not go to temples or churches to repent or confess. I make my peace with my guilt alone. I hold grudges. Yes. I do. I hate you for hurting me. And I always will.
I am a mortal.
You left when I was alone. When I had no one to turn to. You pushed me into no man’s land. You did it knowingly. Hiding behind the pretense of good intentions. You were having a good time when I was mourning you. And you know it. You know you have done me wrong. And yet you ask me not to hate you.
I am sorry. I am not that nice.
I hate you. For hurting me. And I always will.
*Chain of thoughts triggered by Tinkleroof’s blog
Imagination Dead Imagine : Of Hate says:
[...] Ali: i brought an anthology of short stories called birthday stories me: oh nice Ali: yeah its very good different authors but none of them are happy my first pay nah me: hmmm oh congrats Ali: how was your day sweetheart? me: Nothing great actually i was quite morose today Ali: Why? What happened? me: I don’t know. Ali: This is a convenient answer. me: I really don’t know. http://imagine.blogintro.com/641/confessions-of-a-hate-filled-mind Ali: Oh. who are you talking about? me: Don’t know. Ali: i thought i couldnt hate a while back but sometimes there are moments where there are flashes of intense anger and hatred me: hmm Ali: yet intertwined with the most aching of feelings me: yes i know how that feels. it’s the same with me Ali: its like making somebody three dimensional Ali: yet they were and probably are extremely one dimensional me: And slowly they become part of a nothingness Ali: its good to vent it out me: yes i know sometimes i do vent it out but sometimes I feel like being silent. anyway im off to bed have a terrible headache Ali: acha [...]
April 11th, 2007 at 04:36 pm