May 20th, 2006
I Lost My Soul
My shadow creeps on the sidewalks,
They are all empty today.
Used to be crowded once,
But now no one walks this way
The silence is deafening.
It’s ut on a parole.
In these busy streets,
I once lost my soul.
The market that noce bustled
With life, force and energy,
Is today isolated and quiet.
The locks remain but not one Key.
The crowd’s gone,
Everybody has played their role
In this bustling marketplace,
I once lost my soul.
The houses are all deserted.
Where has everyone gone?
I have no choice but
To stand here and mourn.
For the loss is all mine.
Now I have myself to condole.
Why didn’t I look for it then?
Back when I lost my soul…
- Neha
Neha Mujumdar says:
Uh huh…its a good song, but not poetry…I know it comes from you, but its faintly cliched…
May 21st, 2006 at 03:32 pm
Vivek Sharma says:
Starts of nicely,
and then meanders into cliches!
May 22nd, 2006 at 08:56 am
neha says:
I wrote this poem when i was 12.
May 22nd, 2006 at 10:32 am
Sudhanshu says:
i dunno much about poetry …
but it definately strikes a note
maybe the soul is but a fantasy
who knows ! maybe it’s a joke!
May 22nd, 2006 at 12:26 pm
anarya says:
Neha, I liked your imageries. Though in the middle there are a few points whre you lost the rythm. My suggestion will be that if you are writing ryme then keep the rythm intact throughout the whole body of the poem. you have a good imagination from your age of 12, keep it up.
May 25th, 2006 at 07:03 pm